The holiday season is a time for family gatherings and joyous celebrations, but if you are co-parenting with a narcissist, this time of the year can be especially stressful and difficult. Navigating co-parenting with a narcissist is never easy, but being mindful of certain strategies can help make the holiday season more manageable. Understanding the dynamics of your relationship and the negative effects of narcissistic behaviour can help you cope better and take the necessary steps to protect your mental health. With the right approach and attitude, you can make it through the holidays with your sanity intact, even when co-parenting with a narcissist.
Understanding narcissistic behaviour
A narcissist’s behaviour is often unpredictable and irrational. They have an extreme sense of entitlement, an exaggerated sense of self-importance, and crave attention and admiration. They lack empathy and have very low emotional intelligence, which makes it difficult for them to truly understand and connect with others. They often tend to be controlling and manipulative and may resort to emotional or even physical abuse. Narcissists are not always easy to spot; they can come in various forms and can often fly under the radar until we are thoroughly entangled with them. While narcissists can be incredibly charming and likeable at first glance, their true colours often start to show when they become deeply involved with someone. Co-parenting with a narcissist can be extremely difficult, especially if you are also raising children with them. It is important to understand how these traits affect your co-parenting relationship and take steps to protect yourself from narcissistic abuse.
Tips for co-parenting with a narcissist
– Be aware of the negative effects of narcissist behaviour on you and others. Understanding narcissistic behaviours and their impact can help you navigate the relationship more effectively. – Take care of yourself. You cannot effectively parent or co-parent while taking care of a narcissist. You must put your own mental health first. Taking care of yourself can involve setting boundaries, engaging in self-care activities, and getting support from others. – Set boundaries and stick to them. Boundaries are healthy and necessary in any relationship, but especially when co-parenting with a narcissist. – Focus on the present moment. Being present and in the moment will help you to avoid getting caught up in the narcissist’s dramas and power struggles. – Stay connected to the people who love you and who can support you. – Take care of your physical and mental health. – Set realistic expectations for the holiday season
Maintaining boundaries with a narcissist
– Be clear and consistent with your communication. Ensure that your actions are consistent with your communication. If you are not clear with your communication, the narcissist will continue to do things that are unhealthy for the co-parenting relationship. – Stand firm when narcissistic behaviour rears its ugly head. Stay calm and focused, and walk away if necessary. – Set realistic expectations for the holiday season. If possible, try to reduce the amount of time you will be spending with the narcissist over the holiday season by making alternative plans or setting boundaries with your narcissist.
Setting realistic expectations for the holiday season
– Remember that the holidays are about celebrating and enjoying the company of the people you love. While this applies to co-parenting with a narcissist, don’t let the narcissist’s abusive or manipulative behaviour disrupt the joy of the season. – Understand that you cannot change a narcissist. You can, however, change your own reaction to the narcissist’s harmful behaviour. – Keep your expectations realistic. Try to avoid being disappointed or upset if the narcissist fails to live up to your expectations. – Take care of yourself. You are not responsible for the narcissist’s behaviour, but you are responsible for your own.
Practising self-care during the holidays
– The holidays are a busy and stressful time, especially if you are co-parenting with a narcissist. It is important to take care of yourself and practice self-care during this time to reduce stress and protect your mental health. – Set realistic expectations for the holiday season. – If possible, reduce the amount of time you will be spending with the narcissist over the holiday season by making alternative plans or setting boundaries with your narcissist. – Avoid triggering situations and people when possible. – Get adequate sleep. Sleep deprivation can negatively affect your mental health and make you more vulnerable to stress. – Eat a healthy and balanced diet. Avoid overindulging in holiday treats and beverages. – Exercise and engage in other stress-reducing activities.
Dealing with holiday stress
– If you are already experiencing excessive holiday stress, seek support before the holidays begin. – Identify your sources of stress and think of ways to reduce or manage them. – Reach out to the people around you for support and to take some of the burdens off your shoulders. – Be mindful of your thoughts, feelings, emotions, and stress levels. This can help you to stay present and reduce stress. – Reach out to support groups or helplines if necessary. – Take care of your mental and physical health to reduce holiday stress.
Strategies for reducing conflict
– Try to avoid conflict when possible by setting boundaries and being mindful of the effects of your communication. – Identify and understand your triggers and what activates them. – If a conflict arises, take a step back and try to avoid getting caught up in it. – Focus on the issue and what you want to happen. Don’t focus on the narcissist or their reaction. – Use “I” statements to express your needs and avoid blaming the narcissist. – Escalate the conflict as little as possible.
Communicating effectively with a narcissist
– Set boundaries and stick to them. – Be clear and consistent with your communication and actions. – Be assertive and avoid engaging in a power struggle with the narcissist. – Be mindful of your own triggers and try to avoid getting caught up in the narcissist’s drama. – Focus on the issue and what you want to happen. – Use “I” statements to express your needs and avoid blaming the narcissist. – Be prepared to walk away.
Seeking support during the holidays
– Engage in self-care activities, such as spending time with loved ones, getting adequate sleep, and eating a balanced diet. – Reach out to people who care about you and who can support you. – Join Margarita’s support group if necessary. – Read self-help books and articles that can help you to manage holiday stress and cope with narcissistic behaviour. The holidays are a wonderful time of the year when we get the opportunity to celebrate and enjoy the company of the people we love. But if you are co-parenting with a narcissist, this time of the year can be incredibly difficult. Being mindful of certain strategies can help make the holiday season more manageable and easier to navigate when co-parenting with a narcissist.
There is an app where all communication can take place, about the kids only. This way it can be seen to be in the best interests of the children if you are going through court, and you are not personally bombarded by the toxic Narcissist.
Checkout https://www.ourfamilywizard.co.nz/https://www.ourfamilywizard.co.nz/https://www.ourfamilywizard.co.nz/